First, the woke stuff. Of course, he should not have been allowed to go into a Test match arena with only one functioning arm and clearly in pain every time he had to run.
Now, the Woakes stuff. As sporting images go, they cannot come much more iconic than an England number eleven walking out to bat one-handed - his wrong hand - with the game and the Test summer on the line.
Chris Woakes, the stuff of legend, walking down The Oval steps and into folklore. Never mind that he did not face a ball, every step between the wickets put him in agony but put England a step closer to what would have been a remarkable victory.
They fell short in the end but Woakes will forever stand tall in the sport. But as utterly dramatic as the Woakes scenario was, it should not dilute the credit due to an Indian team that made this series so compelling.
And there has probably not been a more compelling tourist than match winner Mohammed Siraj. This, don’t forget, is the player whose mistake when stepping onto the boundary in the process of taking a chance offered by Harry Brook looked to have cost his side the match and the series.
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On an astonishing morning, he roared in, operated consistently at 90mph-plus, took three wickets and sealed the deal by uprooting Gus Atkinson’s off stump with the perfect yorker. And then, there was as good a Cristiano Ronaldo celebration as you are likely to see.
Considering he has exchanged so many verbals with England’s batsmen, the mutual respect at the end of this jaw-dropping contest told its own story. All the talk ahead of the series was about Jasprit Bumrah but Siraj has performed brilliantly in every Test and saved his best for the very last session.
And what a session. Tell me about a more enthralling hour of sport and I’m all ears. Every single ball was a drama and a special mention must go to Atkinson, who looked to be keeping his head when some team-mates - Jacob Bethell on Sunday, Jamie Smith on Monday - were losing theirs.
When he hit Siraj into the stands, the win looked on. At that point, it would have been an unlikely win but, strip away the emotion and tension, and this was a defeat that England snatched from the jaws of victory.
Don’t forget, needing 374 for victory, England were 301-3. That they collapsed from that point was down to a blend of familiar recklessness and unfamiliar tentativeness. Three batsmen were dismissed when dancing down the track.
There was a lot of muddled thinking out there. But then again, how could your cricketing brain not be scrambled amidst such intensity and emotion?
And the bottom line is that both teams deserved something, both teams deserve nothing but credit for producing one of the most absorbing Test series seen on these shores. Every player deserved the most grateful of handshakes … especially the player who had one in a sling.
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